Randomness

TeeJay · 19 Dec 07 :: 00:43

I don't really understand it. Sometimes it takes only a week for things to get there, sometimes it takes three or four, even when I send airmail. Oh well... I just hope Deb gets her presents in time for x-mas and her birthday.

-TeeJay

TheCentralScrutinizer · 19 Dec 07 :: 00:56

I'm betting it'll be here by Friday. If not, no big deal. It's always nice to get prezzies. No matter when they come.

shoothoops22 · 19 Dec 07 :: 18:49

I'm off scool until January 4 im happy

Last edited by shoothoops22 (19 Dec 07 :: 18:50)

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 19 Dec 07 :: 20:36

That's cool Alexis. I got out today at noon and tomorrow I get off at noon. Then I'm off until January 7.

Last edited by BiggestChrisMarquetteFan (19 Dec 07 :: 20:36)

domesticelefant · 19 Dec 07 :: 21:06

Only two more days to work and then I am going on my very first VACATION!
Well, only that it won't be a vacation actually, because I will be moving out of my parents house. Which means a lot of stress.

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 20 Dec 07 :: 21:21

Good luck with moving Anne!

herrommance · 21 Dec 07 :: 19:22

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan wrote:

That's cool Alexis. I got out today at noon and tomorrow I get off at noon. Then I'm off until January 7.

That's when i go back

domesticelefant · 21 Dec 07 :: 20:13

Phoo. This is the first time in two days I have time to come online. I didn't know that I could survive two days without internet. LOL

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 22 Dec 07 :: 06:21

When did you get out of school for Christmas break, Paige??

domesticelefant · 25 Dec 07 :: 15:29

I opened your present yesterday, Tina. Thank you so much, it's great. It'll get a special place in my new apartment. :hug:

TeeJay · 25 Dec 07 :: 22:50

You're very welcome. I'm glad you liked it.

-TeeJay

TheCentralScrutinizer · 25 Dec 07 :: 23:55

Got mine too, wicked cool! Hey Anne, we'll have to scan them monthly so the others can see them.

TeeJay · 26 Dec 07 :: 11:39

I just found this on urbandictionary.com and I thought it was hilarious. IMDb has a lot of those. Hope we don't encounter any in the future again!

Noob
A. INTRO
I. What is this?
II. Defining 'Noob'
B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS
I. Noobish
II. Where to find noobs
III. Behavior of noobs
IV. Noob religion
V. More about noob habitats
C. AVOIDING NOOBS
I. Make sure you aren't one
II. Major noob avoiding strategies
------------------------
A. INTRO
I. What is this?
This guide is designed to give you a better understanding of what a noob is, how to recognize them, some details about them, and how to avoid or get rid of them. It mostly applies to online forums, which are the main targets of migrating noobs.
II. Defining 'Noob'
Contrary to the belief of many, a noob/n00b and a newbie/newb are not the same thing. Newbs are those who are new to some task* and are very beginner at it, possibly a little overconfident about it, but they are willing to learn and fix their errors to move out of that stage. n00bs, on the other hand, know little and have no will to learn any more. They expect people to do the work for them and then expect to get praised about it, and make up a unique species of their own. It is the latter we will study in this guide so that the reader is prepared to encounter them in the wild if needed.
Noobs are often referred to as n00bs as a sign of disrespect toward them, and it's often hella funny, but I will refer to them as noobs during this reading.
* Usually the topic at hand on an internet forum.
B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS
I. Noobish
Often, but not always, noobs will attempt to communicate in their own primitive language, known as "n00bish." It is a variant of the hacker language that exposes them as having little intelligence or will to learn. Here is an example of some noobish. Do not attempt to comprehend it: it cannot be discerned without professionals at hand.
stFU /../..an, i r teh r0xx0rz liek emin3m, u cna go tO EHLL OR ATLE4St help m3 wit hthIS!!111!!!!!!!1~~1!!`` !! LOLLOLOLLOLOLlOoLLOlollLL l u n00b
Although you may find this unbelievably funny and/or annoying, it is best to restrain yourself and keep from talking back to them, as they are very territorial and easily angered. This will result in their attempted verbal abuse of you, possibly backed up by other noobs, because they work in packs when doing offensive tasks. It is not an easy task to learn this language because our intelligent accent will keep it from sounding quite right when spoken. You can write some simple noobish of your own, however, by slamming your face into your keyboard repeatedly.
II. Where to find n00bs
On the internet, n00bs make their colonies on forums. They migrate in waves, usually on weekends, and proceed to clog up bandwidth with stupid questions and sometimes even stupid answers. If you happen to be unfortunate enough to be on a board large enough to attract migrating noobs, there will hopefully be authority in charge who is smart enough to take extermination measures before they can make nests and larger colonies. THE BANNER HAMMER is one form of authority.
Larger colonies can result in the mutation of some into spammers. Not commercial spammers, but pointless spammers. A noob can become one of these at any point, but the larger the amount of noobs, the more chance pointless spammers will appear.
Off the internet, noobs appear anywhere the focus is on learning or discussing something specific.
III. Behavior of noobs
Since noobs are basically ignorant bastards, they have a lot in common. The most often seen characteristic is their fluency in noobish, which is why it got its own section. They will also be very self confident as if they were the absolute best at what they are in fact the worst at. Also, they are quite agressive and self-centered, and tend to laugh a lot using many L's and O's in rapid sucession (the noobish word for laughing like an ultimate retard).
It is their instinct to assemble in packs for defense, and they often attempt to organize packs that they call teams. Unfortunately for them, teams usually result in a total loss of communication and they can often begin to fight amongst each other. These teams are quite unlike those formed by non-noobs.
Noobs have difficulty reading English and cannot comprehend the idea of authority.
Therefore, they have an all-out disregard for rules, basic or not. A good way to identify a noob (bad) vs. a newb (good) is to tell them (or have an authority tell them) which rule they are unknowingly breaking. If they respond with an apology and fix it, they are probably not a noob. If they react by insulting everything around them in rapid noobish and causing general mayhem, it is because they are a noob and have had a small seizure due to their inability to understand what is happening.
IV. Noob Religion
Noobs follow a variation of the 1337 (sometimes 7331) religion, in which they worship the number in odd rituals and put altars in their forum avatars and signatures. They often call themselves 1337, which experts say is somewhat like calling themselves godly in a human language. It's best to not interfere with their religious fantasies and practices because that can lead to a noob uprising, which can turn a forum to mush in less than a week.
V. More about noob habitats
Noobs often attempt to maintain their own web pages. Some common features of these lairs are a terrible lack of content, background music, lots of pointless animated gifs, and pages that say some variation of 'tHEir isnothinG H34r yEtt LOLLOLOL!111!1!!~~~!!`! 13371337', which means 'Nothing here yet' in noobish.
They will also have large, seemingly infinite marquees of 88X31 affiliate buttons replaced with red X's scattered here and there, and possibly a hit counter showing a number less than 100. These habitats are numerous but fairly easy to avoid because only noobs link to them. So if you can identify a noob, don't go to its homepage. Simple as that.
C. AVOIDING NOOBS
I. Make sure you aren't one
Note: This section is bilingual so even noobs can make the discovery if they haven't already.
English (T4lk)-
Read the above parts of this guide carefully. If you find yourself unable to comprehend any of it but are instead beginning to think about how great you are and how awesome 'teh 1337' is, you might want to take one of the many available online quizzes to check your noobancy.
Noobish (133713371337)- Liek, u gott4 re3D teh gudieCAREFUl1y and tehn OMG LIEK I AM R0XX0RZ ya anD ify 0u turn into teh reTARDED u gota go 2 MY WEBP4GE LOLLOLOL!!111~11 ad check 4 warez n stfuu. if u r a n00b go2HELL LOLLOLOlROFLMFAO11!!!11!! !! a/s/l pos gtg n00b suxx0rz ur b0xx0rz OLOOOLOLLLL HELP HELP HELP 1337133713371337
II. Major noob avoiding strategies
The main factor in attracting migrating herds of noobs is a large, active forum. If you find one of these, look to see if it has the management to avoid noob infestation. If not, look for a small or mid-sized forum that covers the same topic so you can enjoy your time there before the noobs find it.
Another way to keep noobs from interfering with your life is to become part of the authority on one of these forums. But that's often hard to do so you'll probably be better off avoiding larger forums first off. If you do manage to become part of the authority, however, take full advantage of it and establish extermination policies so that normal people can have a nice time without noob infestations.
Noob Talk: LAlWAlwalwalWAWLAWLAWA!~! ~!~!!!11!!! 1M NOtttt N0000BZ

-TeeJay

domesticelefant · 27 Dec 07 :: 10:43

TeeJay wrote:

You're very welcome. I'm glad you liked it.

My brother laughed at me, but I still love it. But why did you write the months in German? I mean, it's okay, I was just a little surprised at the beginning. It's still a very cool calendar and I will happily hang it in my new apartment! (Speaking of that, I have pictures, I just need to upload them!)

Yeah, well, I don't have a scanner, but I'll try to take a good pic every month!

TeeJay · 28 Dec 07 :: 16:16

Samsy-Marie wrote:

My brother laughed at me, but I still love it. But why did you write the months in German? I mean, it's okay, I was just a little surprised at the beginning.

I had planned to make it a pre-printed calendar, and the months in German were a part of that (you couldn't remove them). So Deb has the German months too. And the pre-made calendar turned out looking kinda shitty, so I did a quick rescue and cut out the pics to put them in a do-it-yourself calendar. If I'd had a little more time before x-mas, I would have put more thought and effort into it and it might have looked nicer still. Well, there's always next year. Hopefully with more yummy Chris pictures to fill twelve months.

-TeeJay

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 29 Dec 07 :: 10:15

TJ, are you going to sale Chris calendars?? I would soo buy 1 no matter what the price!! As long as it wouldn't cost too much.

TeeJay · 29 Dec 07 :: 10:38

Haha, now there's an idea. Though I don't think I would be allowed to sell a calendar like that. I don't own the copyrights to the images I've been using. Now, if we had 12 gorgeous pics of Chris that we took ourselves.......

But, you know, you can make your own calendar very easily. Just have 12 (13 including cover) pictures printed on photo paper and stick them in a DIY calendar. There you go.

-TeeJay

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 29 Dec 07 :: 23:02

Thanks for the tips!!

domesticelefant · 30 Dec 07 :: 00:24

TeeJay wrote:

I had planned to make it a pre-printed calendar, and the months in German were a part of that (you couldn't remove them). So Deb has the German months too. And the pre-made calendar turned out looking kinda shitty, so I did a quick rescue and cut out the pics to put them in a do-it-yourself calendar. If I'd had a little more time before x-mas, I would have put more thought and effort into it and it might have looked nicer still. Well, there's always next year. Hopefully with more yummy Chris pictures to fill twelve months.

Ah, I see. It's okay. It's still a great calendar.

domesticelefant · 31 Dec 07 :: 00:37

I hate it when the W-LAN plays jokes on me.

TeeJay · 02 Jan 08 :: 15:23

Here's my random post of the day.

First day back at work after a wonderful 2-week Christmas break. From our 9-people team, there's only me and Ulli today. It's very quiet. Most people are still off this week. No phone calls at all. I had read my 150 e-mails by 11 AM. I just finished dusting my desk, which was urgently needed (ick).

I was quite surprised this morning when I found that the outside temps were -2.5 °C (~28 °F). My whole car was covered in quite a thick layer of ice, took me 10 minutes alone to make Jane roadworthy. The nice thing about the frost was that when I drove to work along the Rhein (river), the meadows looked all frosting-covered and white and the sun was only just rising with an orange sky in the background. If I'd had my camera on me, I would have stopped and taken a picture. It was a great sight to start the day.

So I'm gonna break with tradition today and leave the office early. Maybe I'll tackle going to the telecom store to get my new DSL all fixed up.

Talking about which, since I'm switching DSL providers, I will not be able to be online from home for one or two weeks, starting from Jan 6. I will check in at work every now and then, but I won't always have access and may not respond to certain things during that time, especially over the weekends. Bear with me, I'll be back with you as soon as they let me back in the internet sandbox. And then it'll hopefully be really fast (16 MBits/sec!!).

-TeeJay

TheCentralScrutinizer · 02 Jan 08 :: 16:42

That's cool. There wasn't a lot of traffic for me today and school's still out so I kind of expect it to be a bit quiet for the rest for the week here too. But I already had to deal with an annoyed client this morning. Perfect start to my day. Not!

TeeJay · 02 Jan 08 :: 20:15

TeeJay wrote:

Talking about which, since I'm switching DSL providers, I will not be able to be online from home for one or two weeks, starting from Jan 6. I will check in at work every now and then, but I won't always have access and may not respond to certain things during that time, especially over the weekends. Bear with me, I'll be back with you as soon as they let me back in the internet sandbox. And then it'll hopefully be really fast (16 MBits/sec!!).

Okay, so it's gonna be more than two weeks. My DSL line will be available only on Jan 21. Wow. That sounds like a darn long time. Will I survive that long without internet at home? Maybe I should go and camp out at someone's place who has WiFi. At least for the weekends.

-TeeJay

TheCentralScrutinizer · 02 Jan 08 :: 21:07

That is a terribly long time. I don't get why this crap has to take fifty million friggin' forevers. We just got Carol back last night, now we gotta lose TeeJay. :angry:

TeeJay · 02 Jan 08 :: 21:24

Apparently the current DSL provider sits on the DSL line for that long. And the new provider can't assign the line until the old one releases it. That whole process seems to take more than two weeks. It sucks, but there's really nothing I can do about it. So I'll make do with what I have. I might take my laptop to work a few times during the week to use the WiFi there to check mail and do a few things here and there. As for the weekends, I'll just have to go back to boring old things, like, oh... uh... reading books. And of course I can still watch DVDs and such. And I can check e-mail with my 56k modem once or twice a day.

I did this once before. When I moved into this place, I didn't have DSL for two or three weeks. And I still survived. We're losing Anne too, btw... I feel so disconnected.

-TeeJay

Chris Marquette Message Board

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