Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

domesticelefant · 09 Feb 08 :: 23:10

Ah, ok.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 09 Feb 08 :: 23:22

I reposted it here because it kinda fit with the conversation that was going on about only screening it for mallrats. But maybe I'd better bring over ALL the pertinent stuff in case someone goes on a deletion spree. Which is possible since we're speaking truth to power. And they don't like that.

Chnyst · 10 Feb 08 :: 04:37

Hey guys,
Sorry--I was in Dallas for the past couple of days training for a new position at my job--so I'm just now reading this.
You're right about the ending Deb. That's how the script had it and that's how it was originally filmed. Now they've gone and f'd it all up and now trying to brainwash the masses about the cancer storyline. How ridiculous. I will never understand why they want to keep this out of the film. Because it's a comedy? Who cares--Are we not allowed to feel for, and relate, and care for the characters in a comedy? Is this the first comedy to ever deal with serious and REAL life issues? No way.
One of my favorite comedies of all time, Better Off Dead, deals with suicide. How about the subject matter in Patch Adams? There's death in Mr Deeds ,Clerks, Happy Gilmore, Tommy Boy, Drop Dead Gorgeous. Chris Rock dies in a non-comical way in The Longest Yard. I could go on forever but I know I'm preachin' to the choir here. Just had to vent real quick!!

Last edited by Chnyst (10 Feb 08 :: 04:38)

TheCentralScrutinizer · 10 Feb 08 :: 04:48

Thanks, Sean! From your perspective, that's a very valuable assessment. The plant hasn't posted anything today, probably proving that she was indeed a plant. I thought there was supposed to be a second screening last night, maybe of the REAL version. But no one has said anything about that today. More wait and see, I guess...

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 00:06

The plant on IMDb is now protesting that she's not a 17-year-old girl, but a BOY. Makes this older post very entertaining...

Re: Brad Fans
by movieraider321 (Wed Oct 1 2003 15:36:01)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You definatly take the cake, no surprise that he has a following of women whose ages range. I myself am 17, so we're in the minority, but he's just too cute, and too funny!

That's some pretty good girly drooling for a boy. And "it" is still confused about its age. Here's today's highly intelligent post:

Hey morons
by movieraider321 1 hour ago (Mon Feb 11 2008 12:51:23)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm not a 17 year old girl. For one, *beep* ay, you dumbasses. Jesus christ its a *beep* movie deal with it. I'm a 17 year old BOY, and I don't really care, just felt like voicing my opinion on the movie. If you love cancer so much. GO contract it. and die. Do the world a favor. Thanks again.
whatever the hell plant-life is? I don't know
*beep* you,
Christian

Hey Fat Bastard, here's the perfect audience member for your fucktard version of Fanboys. Seventeen forever!

magicalturkey · 12 Feb 08 :: 00:17

Haha... I went to report the spoiler the she-male 17/22-year-old posted and I got this message

Unable to process your request
* Thanks, we already have sufficient abuse reports about this user
* Administrators will be processing these in due course

I tried to report her/him twice, both times I got that message.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 00:30

Figures. Less than 10 posts and already there's sufficient abuse reports. Great job with the hiring of shills, TWC. :rofl: :applause: :grovel:

justme · 12 Feb 08 :: 00:59

:applause:

Yeah, if you're gonna hire a shill might as well hire a good one. I'm glad IMDB is monitoring his/her activities, but I'm not holding my breath. They seldom block the ISPs of the serious troublemakers. These clowns usually have a new account and user ID and are back in business within a day or so. :waiting:

I hope I'm wrong this time. But IMDB is barely monitored at all.:rolleyes:

justme · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:08

Yep, sadly I was right. This person's account no longer exists, but those loathsome posts are still there! :fedup: C'mon, IMDB! Get on the stick!

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:16

Actually, I believe IMDb relies on members to police the boards and in fact does not monitor them at all, except to act on complaints by legit posters. So this idiot him/herself got deleted but the posts remain? Wow.

justme · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:19

Not all of 'em. It seems like the one where s/he told us all to go out and get cancer is gone. Thankfully. It's just that the last time I tried to report something on those boards, there was a snarky paragraph discouraging people from reporting abuses. "Grow up." "Suck it up, ya wussy." and other comments along those lines. I felt like they should either police their boards themselves or not be pissy with others who tried to help out. Maybe it's not so bad now. I hope not!

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:25

He/she snuck in one last jab before they deleted him/her:

Alright, so I did some research about my account and found out that in 2003 my sister who is now 22 posted something using my handle. This is my first real posting thing. So please for the love of god just relax about me thinking the movie was good and my opinion on a cancer based movie. The reason its an opinion is because others can have one. Regardless, loved the movie, please no cancer plot. Oh and if you wanna talk about someone behind their back, don't post the link to the site. Grats on that stroke of genius

Not really sure what that last part meant. I was talking about the nutball to his/her face. I wasn't trying to hide anything. Nice try, shill. Buh-bye.

magicalturkey · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:27

The idiot probably thought you were somehow talking bad about Chris, because you linked to this site

justme · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:28

I thought that was the most hilarious one yet! The "sister" decoded his handle and password rather than create her own account, which takes all of 90 seconds. That's pretty far-fetched!

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 02:33

Or maybe he/she followed the link in the Linus Must Die banner and landed here only to find that we're laughing our asses off at his/her grossly incompetent shillery.

magicalturkey · 12 Feb 08 :: 03:52

There's some kind of glitch on IMDb... everyone's account is removed right now, it looks like. Hopefully it's just a glitch.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 03:57

LOL! That's some glitch!

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 12 Feb 08 :: 04:06

I just went on my IMDB account and all of the info I had in my biography is gone....

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 04:15

Yeah, I looked at mine too. You can still post like you exist and your profile may really still be there, just not showing up. That's what it looks like to me anyway.

magicalturkey · 12 Feb 08 :: 04:18

Yeah, I logged off now I can't log back in... there's definitely something wrong.

justme · 12 Feb 08 :: 04:29

Yeah, that IS weird.:o I'm not gonna log out, though. I don't even remember my old login, much less the password. Think movieraider burned the place down on his/her/its way out?:lol:

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 05:11

Hope not!

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 17:47

Here's a review of the fucktard cut from someone who sounds like another idiot 17 YO boy (who can't write, I mighth add)...

Fanboy Red Redding likes him some FANBOYS
Hey folks, Harry here... It's nice to hear I kickass in this film. I should kickass. I'm fucking Harry Knowles. Asskicker. Ahem. - Actually the real reason I'm an Asskicker in this film is its screenwriter, Ernest "Airwolf" Cline - a long term and good friend of mine. The below review reflects the current "cancer-free" cut of the film... Not surprisingly - it seems to have resulted with a heavily faulted middle of the film. Shock. On the otherhand, it sure does seem to have left this "fanboy" happy as hell... Actually - given that Lucasfilm is opening the new STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS animated film on August 15th... it'd be cool to have the Weinsteins open this film the week before... as an appetizer for us Star Wars geeks, eh?
Red Redding here with a review of FANBOYS.
To get it out of the way, I am a big Star Wars fan. I am not an Uber fan by they are films that I really enjoy. So this made my experience much more enjoyable. If you do do not like Star Wars or only marginally like them, THIS MOVIE IS NOT FOR YOU. With that out of the way here is the review with minor spoilers.
It starts out with the star wars theme music and roll setting up the picture with a clever quip at the end. The story starts off in 1998 where a party is being thrown. At the party is Zoe (Kristen Bell) and Eric (Sam Huntington) who bump into each other and she is surprised to see him. Cut to Hutch (Dan Fogler), Windows (Jay Baruchel) and Linus (Chris Marquette) entering as Darth Vader and two storm troopers. Next scene is with the Hutch, Windows, and Linus having a good time outside when Eric stops by. There is bad blood between Eric and Linus because Eric abandoned the group and doesnt hang with them anymore because he is now living in the "real world." In order to win back their friendship, Eric decides to reignite their plans to go to skywalker ranch and steal Episode one that they all had been planning since they were in 5th grade and thus the story is set and the road trip begins.
There is a person that they are meeting in Texas that is Windows' cyber girlfriend that has the plans to skywalker ranch. So they hop in Hutches tricked out Star Wars van and off they go. While they are sleeping Hutch decided to take a detour to Iowa and stand on enemy (Trekkie) ground at the future site where Kirk will be born. While they are there they run into a group of "Trekkers" and start a scuffle because Han Solo gets called a bitch. There is a fight and the boys leave and head for Texas. When they get there, they realize that Windows' girlfriend is a 10 year old little girl who..... wait for it.... is Harry Knowles niece. Harry beats the shit out of them, but gives them a hookup in Vegas to complete their quest. On their was to Las Vegas, a cop pulls behind them and they use "light speed" to get away but end up caught and thrown in jail. Zoe comes and bails them out and they are let go. They head to Vegas and meet the contact who i will not spoil here. Once they get the plans from the contact they go to skywalker ranch and break in.... fun ensues throughout the house until they get to George Lucas's office and start watching Episode 1.... guards interrupt them and they again are let go. They go back to the van and Eric produces a burnt copy that was in the PC drive... they start watching it, but it has no special effects or any post work done and they decide to wait the six months. They camp out six months later and the movies ends right as Episode 1 begins.
What Worked:
If you are a Star Wars fans, there are in jokes galore and they come non stop in the first half hour. The cast chemistry was great and i think all of the characters were pretty believable. I didn't spoil any cameos because they are all perfectly placed and they are all for Fanboys and they help bring the laughs. The first 30 minutes are hilarious and so are the last 30 minutes. Overall, there are really funny moments in this movement and there were some great hearty laughs.
What Didn't Work:
Keep in mind it is always easier to point out a movies flaws. My first big problem is that they movie seriously drags in its second act... pretty much all of Las Vegas didnt do it for me... at all... The cameos were funny, but it was more for shock value than anything. Another problem is that there is this completely pointless love subplot between Zoe and Windows which is extremely forced. The underlying theme of "quit being a geek and go until the real" is kind of forced and i wish that they would have kept the original kid has cancer theme and it would have been a much better story overall. If there were no subplots in this movie, it would have been much funnier
Conclusion:
This is a star wars fans wet dream. i think i stole that from someone, but who cares. If you are a star wars fan, this movie is a great experience and you should see it with fellow star wars enthusiasts. The audience seemed really responsive and enjoyed it as well. Normally for this type of movie this would be an automatic 6.5 or 7 out of 10, but if they fix some problems in the middle it can be a come a great comedy. Just because it is star wars based my rating is 8/10

And Harry wants us to wait till fucking August?!? Shut the hell up, Harry!

TeeJay · 12 Feb 08 :: 18:31

Well, maybe the middle part of the movie didn't quite work because there was nothing about Linus having cancer in it?? Though I guess the Zoe/Windows love story doesn't really have anything to do with that...

And here's what I find almost reassuring. This guy says that the cancer-free version is for you if you're a Star Wars fan. And ONLY if you're a Star Wars fan. He explicitly says that you won't enjoy it if you don't or only marginally like Star Wars. So, to quote Kyle, the Weinsteins have aspirations of releasing it as a broader comedy. Looks like they're not doing a very good job of it, if this guy can be believed. Now, of course I can't judge whether the cancer version will be enjoyed by a broader audience than the cancer-free one, but since I'm not really a Star Wars fan (and taking aside that I'm a huge Chris fan), I can definitely say that I'd prefer the more emotional version to the ditsy comedic one.

But, well, I'm not a 17-year-old teenybopper, so my opinion doesn't count anyway.

-TeeJay

TheCentralScrutinizer · 12 Feb 08 :: 18:41

You know, I'm getting really tired of these little know-it-all fucktards telling me that I'll hate the movie if I don't love Star Wars. How smug is that? You'll hate it if you're not as hip as them?!? Bullshit! I've read huge chunks of this thing and I got the jokes. Man, I knew I was going to be annoyed when the real "fanboys" started with their blather, but I had no idea it would be this bloody maddening!

Chris Marquette Message Board

#26 09 Feb 08 :: 23:10

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#27 09 Feb 08 :: 23:22

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#28 10 Feb 08 :: 04:37

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#29 10 Feb 08 :: 04:48

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#30 12 Feb 08 :: 00:06

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#31 12 Feb 08 :: 00:17

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#32 12 Feb 08 :: 00:30

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#33 12 Feb 08 :: 00:59

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#34 12 Feb 08 :: 02:08

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#35 12 Feb 08 :: 02:16

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#36 12 Feb 08 :: 02:19

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#37 12 Feb 08 :: 02:25

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#38 12 Feb 08 :: 02:27

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#39 12 Feb 08 :: 02:28

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#40 12 Feb 08 :: 02:33

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#41 12 Feb 08 :: 03:52

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#42 12 Feb 08 :: 03:57

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#43 12 Feb 08 :: 04:06

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#44 12 Feb 08 :: 04:15

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#45 12 Feb 08 :: 04:18

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#46 12 Feb 08 :: 04:29

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#47 12 Feb 08 :: 05:11

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#48 12 Feb 08 :: 17:47

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

#49 12 Feb 08 :: 18:31

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#50 12 Feb 08 :: 18:41

Re: Bend Over FANBOYS... MAJOR SPOILERS!!! ADULT LANGUAGE!!! STAY OUT!!!

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