Randomness

TeeJay · 29 Oct 08 :: 12:23

I know what you mean, Maria. I have a few friends I was close with where distance kinda killed the friendship. I'm bad about keeping in touch too. But I also have a few very close friends that live very far away that I still keep in touch with, if maybe not on a weekly or even monthly basis. My best friend now lives in the UK. We don't talk that often, but we try to see each other once or twice a year. I'm going to visit her again this December for a week. We saw each other in July too, when she was in Germany. And even though we're not in touch that often, when we're together it's like we never were apart. Which is quite amazing, because we both have our own lives, and she's married a really cool guy in the meantime. I guess it also helps that her husband is a sweetheart of a guy and just really cool to hang out with.

Another one of my very close friends now lives in San Francisco (and Deb and Anne have met her too this month). My second best friend just moved further up north, which is now a 90 minute drive from my place. We're not going to see each other that often anymore either.

It has been my experience that the people that you can truly consider friends keep being friends, even though you might grow apart for a while or there is a geographical distance between you. I once made a rubber band comparison. You're connected to good friends with a rubber band. Sometimes you'll be very close, sometimes you're further apart, but you always stay connected somehow. And if one of you pulls at the rubber band, you come closer together again.

Here's another random comment: It's not even November yet, and already I had to scrape ice off my windshield this morning. :fedup:

-TeeJay

CappuGirl · 29 Oct 08 :: 12:48

TeeJay wrote:

I know what you mean, Maria. I have a few friends I was close with where distance kinda killed the friendship. I'm bad about keeping in touch too. But I also have a few very close friends that live very far away that I still keep in touch with, if maybe not on a weekly or even monthly basis. My best friend now lives in the UK. We don't talk that often, but we try to see each other once or twice a year. I'm going to visit her again this December for a week. We saw each other in July too, when she was in Germany. And even though we're not in touch that often, when we're together it's like we never were apart. Which is quite amazing, because we both have our own lives, and she's married a really cool guy in the meantime. I guess it also helps that her husband is a sweetheart of a guy and just really cool to hang out with.
Another one of my very close friends now lives in San Francisco (and Deb and Anne have met her too this month). My second best friend just moved further up north, which is now a 90 minute drive from my place. We're not going to see each other that often anymore either.
It has been my experience that the people that you can truly consider friends keep being friends, even though you might grow apart for a while or there is a geographical distance between you. I once made a rubber band comparison. You're connected to good friends with a rubber band. Sometimes you'll be very close, sometimes you're further apart, but you always stay connected somehow. And if one of you pulls at the rubber band, you come closer together again.
Here's another random comment: It's not even November yet, and already I had to scrape ice off my windshield this morning. :fedup:
-TeeJay

We too had frost this morning. Maybe not so long for the snow anymore. How weird that it's almost time for christmas again. Time flies by so fast...

I like your comparison. I used to be like that with my ex-bestfriend. Lets call her S now. Before she started trying for a kid we were like that when we met. Like never apart. But now it feels so complicated. If I wanted to go visit her, I'd have to take atleast one of my kids with me and I don't know if she'd like it. Or if she even has the space in her place. She lives only 130km (about 80 miles) away from me but with all this hanging between us, it feels longer. I know it's a stubid thing. I should just go there. Then again every time I'm planning to go she says she has to work or has other things. And she doesn't want to come to us anymore. It feels like she doesn't want to meet me. Or rather my kids. Just a hunch. I've read some of the stuff she's written to one MB we both used for a while. She wrote she feels bad hanging with the friends that has kids.. So I'm not imagining, I quess...

domesticelefant · 29 Oct 08 :: 15:57

Somehow all the "close" friends I had in my life vanished. Well, except one I know since I was 3.
I'm not good at making new friends. Maybe because I don't know how to define "close".

And I want to go home now.

Simon · 29 Oct 08 :: 18:54

Don't you just hate it when you buy something online and it's not what you wanted.

Happened to me today with ebay. They advertise with the image of what you want, but still put in little details, to show that they sent the correct item.

Lynnie~ · 30 Oct 08 :: 07:07

On the topic of friendships and keeping them over distances, my family moved around a lot when I was growing up due to my father's job, and I never managed to keep friends longer than maybe four years before moving away and losing all contact. When I was in 6th grade, we finally moved somewhere where I'd end up spending the majority of my teen years and even my early 20s. I established what I'd call very close "sister" type friendships with four girls, all sisters. The youngest two were closest to my age, and twins, so I was closest to them in junior high. We were inseparable throughout junior high and the early years of high school. Later on in high school though we started to drift, and I couldn't help but wonder if it was because I wasn't "cool" enough all of a sudden. They seemed to enjoy hanging out with other friends of ours rather than me because they were more popular than I was. It hurt a lot, and I held onto that pain, and the hope of getting my "bff"s back. With them out of the picture, I started hanging out with their oldest sister a lot more, as she was always really cool and even with the three year difference in our ages, I was proud to consider her a close friend too. So then the two of us got "sister" close when I was in college. We're still very close, and she's admitted to me that she feels closer and more comfortable with me than she did with two other girls whom they grew up with from toddlerhood. To be honest, I was always a little jealous of these other two girls because I didn't really know them (they lived in another city a number of hours away), and I knew I could never be as close to anyone as they were with my friends because I had moved around way too much. It was a depressing thought. But my best friend admitting she's more comfortable with me than she is with them made me feel great. So we've been there for eachother, emotionally, financially, physically, mentally, ever since. She's awesome.

As for her twin sisters, I held onto the pain that they no longer thought I was cool enough to hang out with into our first year of college. I tried to talk to them to mend our differences so we could become friends again, to no avail. It would soon turn to outright malice toward one of them, I have to admit. She was so heartless, and didn't seem to have any feeling, and it hurt even more knowing that she simply was no longer the girl I was "bff"s with in junior high. All hope was gone at getting her back. As the years went by, I got over it, and we're talking again, but aside from our history, I can't really call her any more than an acquaintance now days. And the other one? Well, I never felt malice toward her, we kind of became friends again, but she has a very low attention span. She just simply forgot about me after I moved away. We emailed for a little while, and even called now and then. But soon my emails quit getting replied to, even after I sent four or five. And a time or two I tried "surprising" her with a phone call, and she was always distracted and wasn't even listening to me. I still get the feeling I'm still not cool enough, and she's just not interested in keeping the friendship alive. When she got engaged last year and I heard of it from her oldest sister rather than her, and then I didn't even get an invitation to the wedding, I finally gave up in trying to keep our friendship alive. We're on good terms I guess, I've just quit trying. It's not worth my time or energy to keep a friendship alive when she has no interest in it. So those two friendships are pretty much RIP.

As for the other sister (I did mention there were four, right?), she's real sweet, but she's very sociable and likes to keep very busy. We've always been friends, but she has soooooooo many other friends and is always so busy. I can't compete with all that. So I've never gotten as close to her as I have the other three.

I have no close friends where I am now, since I moved. I mostly just hang out with my family, and sometimes pals from work.

Wow, I think this is the longest post I've made here since I joined.

CappuGirl · 30 Oct 08 :: 17:12

Hey, any plans for the Halloween?

It's relatively new holiday in Finland. Last year we went to a friends place for a kids Halloween party. This year my friend isn't having any and it's too late for me to do it. My first born's friends at the neighbour are having a party so she'll propably go there. What the heck am I going to do to her princess dress to make it more... Halloween?

***

And another thing. If the mail man (or rather lady, I think our's is a female) won't bring me my new books and/or something nice from Tina tomorrow, I'll be pretty darn cranky next weekend. JTT is flying to Helsinki for DigiExpo http://www.finnexpo.fi/digiexpo/default … anguage=en, the largest electronics fair in the whole country. I could finally read a book late till dawn without someone saying it's dumb to stay up because of a book..:/

Last edited by CappuGirlFin (31 Oct 08 :: 19:18)

domesticelefant · 30 Oct 08 :: 18:06

I'm not a big fan of costumes, so no, I don't have any plans for Halloween. I think that's more for kids. And when I was a kid, Halloween wasn't very popular here. We had only carnival in February.

CappuGirl · 30 Oct 08 :: 18:27

Nice story, Lynnie.

When I was on 3rd grade, we moved. And even if it wasn't very far away from my friends (I had 3 good friends in my old school and few less close), the fact that my school changed was enough to spoil the friendships. No more the place where we mostly met. Even when I still visited that town almost every weekend, we drifted apart. Sad. I tried to reconnect with them when I turned 14 and we were in the same school again. It was just too awkward for us all so we gave up. Two-three years ago I found out one of those friends, the one I considered my first best friend, lives in this same town now. So we tried to reconnect again. We have more incommon now, we both having kids and all, but still we aren't really close. She makes me uncomfortable. Like she thinks she's better than me...

When we moved 3rd grade, my school changed from a small school to a big school and I became pretty shy. Ever since I've had a hard time making new friends. I've always had a friend or two but I was never popular. I didn't even want to be. I always thought that the quality was better than the quantity when it comes to friends.

domesticelefant · 30 Oct 08 :: 22:46

Okay, Goodbye W-Lan. Tonight I gave officially up. I'm using the cable now. I HATE THAT!!! I bought W-Lan and I want to use it! But that F******* Piece of sh** has suddenly only local network and no internet. Haha. Good joke. :fedup:

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 31 Oct 08 :: 05:24

For Halloween I'm going to watch horror movies and eat junk food. I'm even going to watch Freddy VS. Jason but only because Chris is in it.

CappuGirl · 31 Oct 08 :: 07:47

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan wrote:

For Halloween I'm going to watch horror movies and eat junk food. I'm even going to watch Freddy VS. Jason but only because Chris is in it.

I'd want to watch that for Halloween too. Too bad the copy I have about it doesn't work. And we have a freaking Catherine Zeta-Jones- weekend on one channels this week. Just shows how Halloween really isn't a finnish holiday yet.. There's pretty much no horror movies on at all.

Well, if the Twilight books come today, that's what I'll be doing for the whole weekend. If not.. Well, I can always watch the American Crime.. followed by Captain Corelli's mandolin so I don't get too obssessed about the agony of Ellen Page..

And a new mall opened yesterday here. Maybe I'll go check it out with the kids. R is all about the new ice cream bar. Those are pretty new at Finland too..

domesticelefant · 31 Oct 08 :: 13:01

I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!! They really sent 136 pages in single PDF Documents! ARRRRGH!!! :witsend::witsend::witsend::doh:

TheCentralScrutinizer · 31 Oct 08 :: 17:12

Man builds special burial chamber to conquer fear of being buried alive. You gotta check this out:

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122540935432186161.html

domesticelefant · 31 Oct 08 :: 17:46

Haha, cool!

Simon · 31 Oct 08 :: 19:04

I love Halloween except for one thing; answering the door. For the last 2 years, ive just ignored it.

domesticelefant · 31 Oct 08 :: 19:22

Yeah, I'm not going to open my door either. I want to keep my chocolate for myself.

CappuGirl · 31 Oct 08 :: 19:43

I just got back home. I took JTT to the airport and on the way back I got to drive my self. He drove like a raving lunatic again so I was a bit nervous driver tonight. Shaking a little because of his driving. I should have stayed at the airport cafe for a while to calm a bit. That dude is developing serious case of road rage.. What should I do about that? He was the main reason I was so nervous on the wheel.. That plus I hate to drive in the dark. And the roads were a bit icy here and there. This is a dangerous time of the year to be driving..

If he gets me killed with that driving and makes my kids orphans, I shall be haunting him for the rest of his life. MUAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

I bought a lot of candy incase we actually get a lot of trick 'r treaters this year. I guess I'm going to have to try paint the kids' faces with something. Maybe I'll have time to go buy some face paints for them... Um, I have this green fuzzy suit for my youngest one. If I'll invent something funny for his legs and hands and head, it might actually qualify as a costume. :rofl: And if the oldest is going as a (zombie?-) princess, I only need to think of something funny for the middle one.. What heck could that be..

Well, the mail man/lady disapointed me again. No books for me. Damn. I'm actually getting paranoid about this. For a moment there I found myself thinking someone stole them from the mailbox. :rofl: I've never been this anxious about mail before. And that's something... 'cause I do a lot of mail ordering!

So what shall I do tonight. I promissed the kids they can stay up 'till 10pm. Maybe they'll sleep later that 8am then.. After they go to bed I'm going to drink that one single long drink that I got for myself. One is enough. I don't want to be drunk when the kids are at home.. Of course I could watch some movies. I'll propably do it on this computer. I spend way too much time on tis computer! So you guys are stuck with me hanging around here all night long. I'll propably get a bit insomniac too. :rofl:

Last edited by CappuGirlFin (31 Oct 08 :: 19:47)

Simon · 31 Oct 08 :: 23:33

Well, it's 9.30pm and we've only had 2 visitors and that was before 6pm. I would eat when we were giving them, but it literally takes an hour to eat it all.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 01 Nov 08 :: 05:50

Holy Wowzers! Check this out. A cave has been discovered in Chihuahua, Mexico with the largest crystals so far found on earth. Look at the pictures and note how small the men are in them. This is just stunning: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news … index.html

This one's like being inside a giant geode!

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 01 Nov 08 :: 06:25

That cave is amazing! I would love to explore it.

domesticelefant · 01 Nov 08 :: 08:33

Wow, that looks stunning!

Illinoisguy1 · 01 Nov 08 :: 08:59

If it wasn't from National Geographic I would have thought it was fake.

Some don't even look real do they?

It looks like he was comped into the pic. It looks unreal.

CappuGirl · 01 Nov 08 :: 10:55

Awesome! Beautiful.

... And now we shall see how some 'nice' people are going to ruin that all by mining it, making it a tourust trap or something...

domesticelefant · 01 Nov 08 :: 11:56

Can someone make me get up and do the thing I wanted to do today, please? I feel crappy and I don't even know why.

Simon · 01 Nov 08 :: 13:46

Woah. They look so amazing. Reminds me of a scene out of Superman.

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