Joke Of The Day

magicalturkey · 08 Aug 08 :: 03:39

I usually hate blond jokes, but this is the best one ever seriously... http://j-walkblog.com/index.php?/weblog … lond_joke/

:rofl:

Don't give the punchline away

TheCentralScrutinizer · 08 Aug 08 :: 04:20

Um, where the hell is the damn joke? This links to something that links to something that links to something, and I see no joke. Is that the joke?

justme · 08 Aug 08 :: 04:24

Yep. This is my favorite blonde joke of all time:

http://www.jokething.com/jokes/7/7034

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 08 Aug 08 :: 04:32

That video of Paris is funny but she still annoys me.

magicalturkey · 08 Aug 08 :: 13:58

Sisterdebmac wrote:

Um, where the hell is the damn joke? This links to something that links to something that links to something, and I see no joke. Is that the joke?

Really? But yeah, you're supposed to keep clicking and clicking and clicking until you're like "wait a minute...", which apparently blond's would never do and they'd just get annoyed there's no joke. It would be better if the fourth link didn't link back to the first link, but whatever. That just makes it funnier if you keep clicking after you're back to the original

TheCentralScrutinizer · 08 Aug 08 :: 15:14

OK, even I'm not that obtuse.

magicalturkey · 20 Aug 08 :: 22:03

This guy needs to try out for American Idol next season: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Vz-63WTQdY

I feel bad for him. But he's really just setting himself up for ridicule.

justme · 21 Aug 08 :: 00:07

Yeah, that's pretty pitiful. But if William Hung got his 15 minutes I guess this guy can have four or five.:D:doh:

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 21 Aug 08 :: 05:38

He soo should. He's hysterical!

magicalturkey · 21 Aug 08 :: 12:09

Thing is, I don't think he's trying to be hysterical.

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 22 Aug 08 :: 06:05

You should leave him a comment on his video. If he's willing to post a video of him singing he shoiuld be willing to take criticism.

CappuGirl · 27 Oct 08 :: 07:15

I quess this is the right place to post this...

Garden Grass Snakes, also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis), can be dangerous.
Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. Here's why.
A couple in Morro Bay, California, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent chilly spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.
It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream.
The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa.
He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.
His wife thought he had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still, and called an ambulance.
The attendants rushed in, wouldn't listen to his protests, and loaded him on the stretcher and started carrying him out.
About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher.
That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.
The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor.
He volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief.
But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, and the snake rushed back under the sofa.
The neighbor, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.
The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.
The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that he had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.
By now the police had arrived.
They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little green snake.
The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.
The little snake again crawled out from under the sofa. One of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it.
He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over and the lamp on it shattered, and as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.
The other policeman tried to beat out the flames and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped up and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.
Meanwhile, the burning drapes were seen by the neighbors who called the fire department.
The firemen had started raising the fire truck ladder when they were halfway down the street.
The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the electricity, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).
Time passed! Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car, and all was right with their world.
A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.
That's when he shot her.

This and many more funny things @ http://treebeard31.wordpress.com/ I don't know if you're formilliar with it but I just found the site and it cracked me up! :rofl:

CappuGirl · 27 Oct 08 :: 08:15

Have you ever heard of these guys?

http://www.peteandbrian.com/

Pete and Brian just made my belly hurt... :rofl:

magicalturkey · 30 Nov 08 :: 00:38

A comic strip for cat lovers (in a comic for book lovers... kind of) http://www.krrobar.com/mikebookseller/comics/130.html

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 03:13

Not a joke, but still funny as hell. Watch as people hurl stuff at Bush.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/12/1 … 51129.html

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:05

That's hilarious! Whoever posted that is a genius.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:07

Mel! We missed ya. Where ya been?

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:11

My computer got a virus so it had to be fixed.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:23

Oh, man, that sucks. It has happened to me a couple of time. Everything OK now?

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:25

Right now I'm on my dad's computer. Tuesday morning the guy who fixed it is bringing it over sometime in the morning.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:27

I see. Hope you get everything sorted out really soon. Have they told you some ways to keep it from happening agina?

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:40

Somehow my virus protection got expired. On Friday I had this weird popup that wanted my to install a new one. Then I did a computer scan and it found only 1 virus and then it found like 4 more. Now I'm going to have a stronger virus and spam protection and scan my computer everyday.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:41

That should do it. Are you using Firefox or Internet Explorer?

BiggestChrisMarquetteFan · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:44

Internet Exlorer.

TheCentralScrutinizer · 16 Dec 08 :: 04:46

Make the switch. It's super easy and you won't ever have to worry about pop-ups anymore. When you get your computer back, I'll help you if you want. It really is a lot safer. And tabbed browsing is awesome.

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